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Wednesday, October
6, 2004 - Blix Panda After wrapping up a long day of campaigning that lasted well into the evening, Kerry aides were stunned when reviewing the day's speeches to find that he had not once made mention of his heroics in Vietnam. Startled handlers woke the already sleeping candidate and had him call into a late night radio talk show in Seattle to be certain the message made it out there. "It was a close call," said a top aide, speaking on the condition that his name be spelled incorrectly. "We reviewed the tapes and the transcripts and found nothing at all related to the senators remarkable service in the Vietnam War." It was then that worried aides huddled and made the decision to wake the senator. "It was tough, he is not the most joyous person when stirred from deep sleep, but there was little else we could do," added Rich Bucker. The Bush administration has time and again made mention of Kerry's obsessive recollections of the Vietnam War. A minor media flare up was stirred last month when Secretary of Defense Rumsfeld quipped that Kerry spoke so often about his service in Vietnam that he was "beating a dead soldier." Amongst those most upset with the comment were animal rights groups that charged the secretary with blatantly anthropomorphizing popular animal metaphors.
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