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the Wired Press > Archives

Monday, April 26, 2004

Satirists forget to write article about 420

Bay Area, CA - The Wired Press, best known for their witty stories, clever headlines and sporadic publishing schedule, realized today, April 26th, that they had forgotten to concoct an article for the infamous day of 420, which is known to the sober world as April 20th.

Clark Brandon, lead writer for the Wired Press, told the WP that he had written down a few ideas for the day, but could not find his list, which he says must have been hidden under his bags of Doritos and Soft Batch cookies. Being that the ideas were scrawled on a Zig Zag, Brandon says it is also possible that the list, itself, may be gone for good.

"I talked to Curtis just the day before, and he mentioned that we should come up with some killer ideas for 420. Being a whore for traffic, he seemed genuinely excited by the thought of exploiting 420 for the sake of advertising revenue. But then.. when the.. um.. fuck. ..you gonna eat that? What were we talking about again?"

Blix Panda, another writer for the Wired Press, claims that he sent Curtis a couple stories, but realized his efforts were futile when the replies he received from Curtis were vaguely recognizable as English and almost completely incoherent.

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