Monday, February
2, 2004
Super
Bowl Breast Coverage
Michael to Janet: You're an embarrassment to the family
Houston, TX - Michael Jackson, the King of Pop and star of The
Smoking Gun, released a statement this morning through the
Nation of Islam, condemning his sister's bare-breasted Super Bowl
halftime stunt. The stunt has become the most talked about story
from the 2004 Super Bowl, overshadowing the Patriot victory and
inciting more internet traffic than MyDoom's swipe at SCO.
At the end of the performance, Justin Timberlake, who is known
for his über-impressive sexual résumé, ripped
off part of Janet's costume exposing her right breast. This while
he sang "I can have you naked, by the end of this song,"
a line from his "Rock Your Body" single. While Janet
quickly moved to cover her breast, the broadcast's sound was completely
eclipsed by a collective "damn!" and high-fives from
men the world over.
Michael stated that this incident is by far the most embarrassing
of any Jackson scandals in recent years.
"I've stood by Janet through thick and thin. Through her
nasty divorce, to the rumors of her espresso-laced enemas. But
this has gone too far. The Jackson family name has stood for dignity
and pride for so long. For her to ruin it with one fell swoop
of Justin's perverted hand is disgraceful. What will the world
think of us now?
"To molest young boys is one thing, the Catholic Church
understands that. But to expose yourself in front of 140 million
people. Where does this madness end? We have to draw the line
somewhere."
Jermaine Jackson, who has been competing with Gloria Allred for
the coveted "Media Whore" title, offered his insightful
commentary on Fox News this morning.
"I'm kinda on the fence with this one. I mean, I love Janet
more than the world, but she shamed the family yesterday. Now,
instead of the Jackson name being synonymous with family values
and man-boy love sleepovers, it will be linked forever with Janet's
bare breast. We can't have that."
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